What I did for my family is to start reading to them at mealtimes. They
love being read to. It was pretty common for me to not eat with them
anyway though, because I would cook the meal and eat some of it,
and just plain not be hungry by the time they ate.
Eventually we all started eating mainly lunch, and everyone eats
it, mostly together. For dinner, if we eat together, it's usually
around a shared movie (we tape something everyone likes). I
do craft projects: they eat snacks.
For going out: sure, go out and drink. When I drink with people
I usually order fizz water with lemon. Basically I don't want to
drive under the influence for other health reasons. Maybe they
would appreciate having a driver anyway?
But yeah: socializing around food is a very human thing,
and it's built-in. I don't know a good way to change
people's minds about this. It's been a hard issue for me for
some time, for another reason: I can't eat wheat (celiac), and
it makes me very, very ill. There are few places I can eat
safely. It's one of the things that prompted me to adopt
this lifestyle, and it's been liberating to me. But when I go
to a party or a convention or whatever, it simply can't be about
food for me, and if they expect me to eat, I just can't.
Mostly though, people don't notice exactly what I'm eating.
I look at them and talk to them and sip on whatever I
happen to have, or sometimes nibble on some raw vegie
(I stretch the definition of "fasting" at times to include
low-calorie raw vegies like lettuce, green peppers, etc.,
which don't affect blood glucose much). For drinking you
can tip the barperson and say something like "keep bringing
me soda and lime" and they'll do it. If people ask, I say
I got addicted to it in Europe (I did, actually) and love that
I can drink many of them a night.
And don't let people "guilt you" into doing what they
do. You are right: if they feel badly because you don't
do what they do, it's their problem. You can just laugh:
"Oh, so if I don't drink what you drink, you'll be miserable?
Wow! It is so easy to make you miserable! What else
can I do that would make you miserable?"
Seriously, if the people in your life can control you that easily, it
will cause you problems in other areas too. Decide what
YOU need to do, and do it. If you aren't actually affecting
them directly (like, you decide to smoke and that affects
the air they breathe), then don't worry about it. "Not eating
what they eat" is not exactly friend-abuse.
On Wed, Sep 2, 2009 at 12:05 PM, anusarabetty<anusarabetty@yahoo.com> wrote:
> Hi everybody,
>
> I've been following Fast-5 for a couple months, and overall, I love it. My main challenge is not with the diet itself, but with the attitudes of the people close to me - friends, family, boyfriend. It's not that they're outwardly critical (frankly, I couldn't care less if they think I'm nuts), but rather that they become personally offended if I don't want to eat with them. My boyfriend gets upset if I don't want to go out for breakfast, and my friends are mad if I don't want to get a drink at 11pm (my hours are 4-9pm).
>
> The thing is, I try to be as accommodating as possible - I'm always perfectly happy to go along to a restaurant or bar, or to suggest an alternative activity and way to spend time together without focusing on food, but they're almost never interested in my suggestions, and they become hurt and disappointed that I won't eat. It's like their own personal enjoyment of their dining or social experience depends upon my consumption, and I don't understand it.
>
> Frankly, I think they're being pretty selfish to make me responsible for their happiness. I refuse to feel guilty about sticking to my guns and following through with a goal that makes me happy and feeling great. Sometimes, though, I do cave in just to appease my friends and avoid the conflict - not to mention, the constant temptation being shoved in my face is quite a challenge for my willpower.
>
> Has anyone had success in dealing with this issue? I don't want to alienate anyone or create conflict, I just want to be left alone about my personal diet choices, and to stop being sabotaged with their emotional blackmail! What's a tactful way to handle this with people close to me?
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
--
Heather Twist
http://eatingoffthefoodgrid.blogspot.com/
------------------------------------
Yahoo! Groups Links
<*> To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/fast5/
<*> Your email settings:
Individual Email | Traditional
<*> To change settings online go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/fast5/join
(Yahoo! ID required)
<*> To change settings via email:
mailto:fast5-digest@yahoogroups.com
mailto:fast5-fullfeatured@yahoogroups.com
<*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
fast5-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
<*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to:
http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
[get this widget]
